Ugh, lack of posting.
Not a whole lot has happened since my last post. There was a good amount of Studio Drama in several different ways but it’s all been resolved and I think we’re back to being our happy little Studio Time bubble of crazies.
I mean really, there’s only so long you can work with people before something happens. I have to say, we’re a good group of crazies, though. We bounce back, we forgive, and we move on.
I’m going to Famous Footwear tomorrow to buy a pair of fur-line clogs (my old ones from a year and a half ago went to The Great Closet In the Sky, no more treads and you can only superglue them so many times…) because I can’t bend over to tie my shoes and all I have are ballet flats. I wore them today and they were fine until the temperature dropped about 15 degrees and I thought my feet would fall off by the time I got home. So clogs it is, and Mom thinks that it’s a good idea.
Also, I’d like to get this out:
I want to apologize to anyone that feels that I might be being a crappy friend or that has caught me in one of my mood swings. Chronic pain is a beast (that will hopefully be tamed soon, I hopehopehope it will). I don’t expect many people to understand the pain, necessarily, but rather that if I do get irritated or I don’t look happy, it probably has nothing to do with you.
My pain gets worse as the day wears on. I am physically and mentally worn out by about 5pm. I don’t know how many are familiar with the pain rating numbers (rate your pain, 0 being no pain at all, 10 being the worst and unbearable) but by mid-day and evening, it’s usually around a 7 or 8. I consider my episode of Christmas Eve to be a 10, which I know doesn’t give much of a perspective to most, but that’s how I try to judge it. And why am I even thinking about it this way? I’m supposed to keep some of a record for my appointment next week so that they can assess what needs to be done.
This turned out to be much more of an explanation than I planned, but I’m hoping that it will help people understand that it’s not really anything I can control and that as much as I hate it, it does put me into a not-so-great mood at the end of the day. I am trying–and getting better about it, I hope–to not take it out on/at others.
I realize that I might not be the most pleasant person to be around lately, and I really do feel bad, and for that, I apologize.
I need to be knitting more. It’s meditative and puts my mind to something positive. I think I’ll start trying to put aside a bit of time each day to do it: it’s because much more than a hobby now.
On a completely unrelated note, I got to see Clayton today. I realized the other night that I haven’t seen him in a few weeks, so we met up after I was done with work and went to Caribou. We talked about a lot and I think that I’m in a better mindset now about a few things.
And! Last thing: I think that tomorrow I will upload the production projects that I have done so far this semester for WCRX. They will be here soon, I promise. (:
This past week has been out to get everyone. March (and warm weather) needs to get here fast,
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